i can keep my mind off of how much of an idiot you are.
just be nice. please. especially when i’m trying to..
but i have this weird thing with feet. even (especially) with girls. like i’m no lesbian, but i just really like it when they have nice feet! or with guys. omg. i could never date a guy with ugly feet. they could be so cute but if their feet are gross, i couldn’t do it. i hate when girls wear sandals and their feet are all like. nasty and their toes are all chipped or unpainted. unless their toes are super pretty without nail polish. i was at church on wednesday and this girl walks by me and she had like super nice feet..or toes. her toes were cute and i caught myself starring. i don’t really know what makes me so happy about them hahaha that seems weird. i feel so creepy right now. jesus christ
i was about to paint my toes last night and i told henry i needed the light on to see and he was like “why don’t you just leave them unpainted?” o_O what. no. and so i explained my whole foot thing with him and he just looked at me and said “i think your crazy” . i don’t think i’m crazy. it makes sense.
i really really don’t.
i feel so sad, like always when you tell me the truth.
Mmm. i want to talk to alex right now but i can’t explain the situation to him of course. i just want to talk to him. he hasnt replied to my text..
i really like you. and lately, it seems like you really like me back just cause you’ve been showing it more.
but when i ask what you see us as and you answer “friends”, it kinda breaks my heart a little. but its okay.
In the wise words of adele, “This time I’ll be braver, I’ll be my own savior”
You know. I just have to come to realize that my skin isn’t perfect and will probably never be, even if i do get rid of the acne. There will still be scars and even though it makes me really sad, i just have to accept it. there are a lot of times where i’ll tear up or cry when i put on my make up or when i wash my face because i think really hate how it looks and it feels like nothing is going to help. I have to remember that people are probably not looking at it and its mostly me that sees it. I know there are people out there with much worse, but that doesn’t change how i feel about mine. I can’t be embarrassed anymore, the best thing i can do is try to take care of my skin the best way that i can. some people don’t understand how sad and self conscious their acne can make them. like alex thinks I’m insane and pitiful for crying about it but he really doesn’t get it. its one of the things that makes me feel so ugly. and i know those of you out there get me. but we’re not ugly. “insecurity is what’s ugly”
sorry for the rambling. I need to remind my mom about the dermatologist.
i want to get my nails done.
i want to shave my legs.
i want to be taken on a date.
i havent shaved my legs in forever..
sundays are kind of a drag when you’re not doing much.
that time of month sucks a lot.
my house is pretty dark right now.
i’m kinda scared for valentines day..
i wish i was home alone right now so i can watch that justin bieber documentary.
i wish acne didn’t exist.
i want lots of chocolate and food and pizza
i like my nails right now
my room is really dirty
so is my kitchen
liz isn’t listening to me
just a couple things that are on my mind right now..